i build myself
The past is a ghost, the future a dream. All we ever have is now. +

Chapter 3- Kiss

Hey guys, I’ve spent ages on this chapter and me and my editor Temima have worked hard on this one, so if you like this chapter please like it or reblog it and feel free to send me a message about what you think about the chapter. 

Thank you, I hope you like it!


Me: Kentucky’s boring without you.

Josh: Anything is boring without me ;-)

Me: When are you coming back?

Josh: Well I’ve been gone for a week, so tomorrow.

Me: Good, I’ll see you then.

Josh: I can’t wait.

I keep replaying that moment in my head, the moment when Josh’s soft warm lips gently caressed my cold cheek, igniting my body with electricity and fire.

I softly touch the cheek he kissed with the back of my hand.

Josh Hutcherson kissed me.

In the week Josh has been gone, pictures have surfaced the internet and the television of him and Jennifer Lawrence laughing and smiling together.

I not only feel a pang of jealousy, but a new strange feeling is also hidden inside of me. A feeling I can’t get rid of and a feeling I can’t explain.

24 hours till I see him.

24 hours until I can go out and forget everything.

24 hours until I can hug him and be his.

My feelings were getting out of control; I wanted him to kiss me again.

I wanted to feel like I did that night, I want to feel like on top of the world.  

I have a horrible feeling that I may be falling in love with Josh Hutcherson.

“Hey stranger” a familiar husky voice calls behind me as I pick the weeds up from the front yard.

I spin on my heels and in front of me stands, the boy I think I’m falling in love with.

“Josh!” I run up to him and without thinking I wrap my arms around his firm body.

He chuckles and wraps his arms around my waist squeezing hard.

Is this really happening?

“I’ve come to ask you something” he says releasing me from his grip.

“Ask away” I reply taking a step back.

“Would you like to come to dinner with me tomorrow night? My treat” he says looking at me directly in the eyes.

Dinner…with Josh Hutcherson?  

“Yes!” I reply more enthusiastically than I hoped for.  

“Great I’ll come and get you at about 7, make sure you’re ready” he says, giving me another quick hug before saying goodbye and walking away.

I sit and wait looking at the clock in my flowery dress and hair brushing against my bare back.

6.59pm

My mum comes into the kitchen and brushes my face gently with the back of her hand.

“You look beautiful” she whispers in my ear.

I smile at her and squeeze her hand.

At exactly 7.00pm, I hear a knock at our door.

I stand up and give my mum a quick peck on the cheek and run out of the room to open the front door.

There he stands, in an outfit that makes my pulse quicken uncontrollably.

“Hey” he says smiling.

“Hey” I reply, closing the door behind me.

“You look beautiful” he takes hold of my hand and a million lights suddenly flash in my face.

Paparazzi scream and shout in our faces, asking us all sorts of questions.

Josh ignores them and so do I; we enter the black car that is waiting for us on the curb of my house.

When we arrive at the restaurant, the paparazzi are already there and the camera clicks start again blinding me with their flashing lights.

We walk into the restaurant with Josh’s hand grasped around mine.

When we enter the restaurant, the room falls silent and everybody turns around and stares at us.

A member of staff quickly ushers us to a private room in the corner of the restaurant.

We sit down without saying a word, and takes our orders, we still say silent.

“I’m sorry” Josh says, with a hushed tone.

“Sorry for what? For bringing your neighbour to a beautiful restaurant?” I reply raising my eyebrow.

“I’m sorry of what you’re going to have to go through now” he says.

“What do you mean?” I reply carefully.

“They’re going to be following you and calling you all the time. I’m so sorry Lacey” he says rubbing his temples with his index finger.

“It’s fine” I say, reaching for his hand and squeezing it gently.

Before he can answer, our food arrives and we eat in silence, again.

“I like you, Lacey” he looks at me, his warm hazel eyes settling on mine. “I like you a lot”

I sit there looking gormless, trying to process what Josh just said to me out of the blue.

“Earth to Lacey, earth to Lacey” he chuckles lifting my chin up with his finger.

“I like you too Josh” I say smiling “more than you’ll ever realise”

I stuff another mouthful of potato back in my mouth before I say something worse.

He looks at me again, with a painful expression like he had just been whacked in the face with a hammer.

“What do you mean?” he says.

“You’re a celebrity” I reply “I’m a normal person, why would you like me?”

He looks at me with another shocked expression.

“So that means I can’t fall in love with a normal person. I have to like another celebrity” he says with an angry tone.

“No, but it’s highly unlikely that you would fall in love with a person like me” I reply, stuffing another forkful of food in my mouth.

 Could this get any worse?

He shifts his chair nearer to mine and reaches for my hands, carefully cupping them in his. He rubs his fingers in a circular motion around my palm.

He looks up and looks me straight in the eyes again.

“Well, guess what. I have” he says.

Before I can reply, he leans in slowly but surely.

I can feel his breath moving closer and closer to my lips.

“Lacey, I like you more than you realize” he whispers.

He moves in closer and his lips finally press against mine, sending a rush of electricity through my body.

He moves his hands around my waist and he shuffles his chair closer to mine his lips still pressed against mine.

He lips part gently part from mine, and my lips instantly moan for more. Like a baby without it’s dummy.

I go in and kiss his lips again but he eventually pulls apart and chuckles to himself.

He releases my waist and shuffles back over to his plate again.

I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand and stuff another forkful of food in my mouth trying to keep my lips occupied.

I wake up in the morning with James at the bottom of my bed, a magazine in his hand.

His face is like stone, cold and hard.

“Yes?” I say propping myself up on the back of the bed.

He doesn’t reply but instead hands me the magazine.

On the front cover is my worst nightmare.

There is a photo of me and Josh at the restaurant, kissing.

How did they get this photo, we were in an enclosed room with only one window in it.

The headline reads “The Hunger Games star hungry for girls.

What a great journalist came up with that crap headline.

I laugh to myself and look up to see James staring at me.

“It’s not funny, Lace” he says his tone emotionless. “Mum is downstairs pulling her hair out at all the calls we’re getting. Paparazzi are piled outside of the house. We are prisoners in our own home.” He finishes his sentence and leaves the bedroom.

Shit.

Buzz Buzz Buzz Buzz

My phone buzzes constantly for the next couple of minutes before I dare to pick it up.

My phone has 15 messages and 20 missed calls.

Unknown numbers pile up in my call log but there is one name that stands out, Joshes.

Josh: I’m sorry Lacey. I’m sorting it out right now. Can I come and see you?

Me: Honestly Josh, I don’t think you should. My mum’s getting all stressed, give it a couple of days.

Josh doesn’t reply so I walk downstairs to see my mum her head on the counter top and my dad patting her back gently.

As soon as they realise I’m there they both look up and stare at me with blood shot eyes.

“Hey Mum, Hey Dad.” I say sympathetically. “I’m really really sorry, Josh is sorting it out”

I walk over to my mum and carefully put my arms around her gently rubbing my hand against her back.

I walk over to the front window and carefully open the blind a bit. I look outside to see cars surrounding our house; they’re even up on our lawn snapping photos of any movement that happens inside the house.

“Oh crap. I’m sorry. This wasn’t supposed to happen, it was just a kiss” I say turning towards my parents. “Unplug the phone and turn your mobile off” I advise them.

My dad immediately springs into motion and goes into another room to do as I’d asked.

My phone buzzes again and I quickly check it.

Josh: I’m sorry.

But instead of answering, I turn my phone off and chuck it away.

I’m not ready for this; none of us are ready for a public life.

 I love Josh, and that will never change, but I respect my family and I don’t want them hurt by my selfish decisions.

***

After days of ignoring Josh’s calls and texts, my heart feels empty.

I feel nothing anymore; I don’t have anything to look forward too.

I do have him to look forward too.

The paparazzi have finally left mine and Josh’s house realising that nothing was going to happen.

I sit on the couch playing with my fingers, brushing all the places Josh touched me, remembering how I’d felt when he kissed me.

I don’t realise it but my mum gently sits down next to me.

“You don’t have to stop seeing him for us you know” she says

“Yes I do. I’m not ready for that, I’m not ready for having someone following me around for the rest of my life. I’m not ready to let you live like that either.” I say holding back the tears.

Don’t cry Lacey.

“I don’t care what happens to me and your dad, Lacey. We’re strong enough to handle anything that people throw our way. But, I do care what happens to you. You and Josh obviously have some sort of thing for each other after only two dates together, that’s something you can’t just throw away because of some mishap. Follow your heart” while saying that she gently pats my throbbing heart, the heart that is longing for Josh.

“Thanks Mum” I reply slowly “but I’m not selfish. I want the best for you”

She laughs and then looks at me again.

“It’s my job to want what is best for you Lacey, not yours. Call Josh, and work things out.” She touches my cheek softly, the cheek Josh kissed that night, the kiss that made me fall for a boy I shouldn’t have fallen for.

She gives me another sympathetic look and moves out of the living room leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I pull my phone out of my pocket and slowly tap Josh’s digits into my phone.

He doesn’t answer and instead it goes straight to voicemail.

“Hey Josh, it’s me. Lacey. I’m sorry for ignoring you this last week, I’ve been worried that if something did happen between us that it wouldn’t only affect our lives but also our family’s life. But, I’ve realised my family are strong and can handle anything. I would love to go back to we were but if you don’t want to, I totally understand. Even though that would suck and this empty feeling I have right now will never go I understand your choices and I hope you understand mine. Please text me if you get this message, so I know how you feel. Ok, well, urm bye then.”

I hang up the phone and wait for the text that will either fill this empty hole or make it even worse. 

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